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Swoosh goes the salami slicer and British freedom gets a little bit smaller, a little bit narrower. Nobody will do anything about it because who wants to be called a homophobe and a bigot? We are cowed into inaction by this slanderous lie ...read
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After Rory Bremner fooled Margaret Beckett into thinking he was Gordon Brown, I couldn't help wondering who else he might have spoofed. Then, right on cue, a plain envelope landed on my desk, containing the following tape ...read
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The middle classes, it seems, are in denial. People - not you and me - have been surveyed as to how they see themselves. They are mainly comfortably off and well educated. But they seem to want to assert working-class roots to establish their credibility ...read
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Over the years, the sleepy Cotswold town of Winchcombe has grown used to visitors admiring its breathtaking views and quaint Abbey. But now its residents are up in arms over a new tourist attraction disturbing their rural idyll ? Elizabeth Hurley. ...read
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Leonardo Di Caprio boasts in Elle magazine: 'I own two hybrid cars and I've installed solar panels on my roof. I offset my carbon use by replanting forests in various parts of the world.' Wouldn't one hybrid motor suffice? ...read
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Peter Mandelson had a sly dig at Labour arch foe Gordon Brown when he bumped into David Cameron at the Davos economic summit in Switzerland ...read
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Labour's leadership question, far from being that 'smooth and orderly transition', is unravelling into comedy. Gordon Brown, exposed to honking hilarity in the Commons, showed every indication of hating the whole business ...read
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As the saying has it, truth is sometimes stranger than fiction. There are times when real life makes spy author John le Carré look positively pedestrian. The Lib Dem MP Norman Baker has said that Dr Kelly could not possibly have committed suicide and even suggested that Dr Kelly had been 'assassinated' ...read
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We have been instructed from on high to have a heated discussion-about Britishness. We must define it, defend it and celebrate it endlessly. Which is all extremely odd ...read
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Labour MP and former welfare minister Frank Field likens Gordon Brown to Mrs Rochester, the mad-woman who burns down her husband's mansion in Charlotte Bronte's novel Jane Eyre ...read
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The six-month rule of politics, as I like to call it, continues firmly in operation. The rule says that confidently forecasting the political weather and understanding the factors that cause it is best left to amateurs ...read
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These days, it would seem that some parents tend to give birth to investments rather than children. Thus Niall Mason has been uprooted from his Brighton home for an upbringing in Madrid and Jack Higginson regularly takes the High Road from Rochdale to Manchester ...read
When I was new to Fleet Street, quite the most popular character in what some cynics called The Boulevard of Broken Dreams and others The Street of Misadventure was the manager of one of the many branch banks in the area ...read
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Royalty is as royalty does. If the first couple in this golden balls-aching realm of celebrity want to out half-a-million quid on the night when Footballers' Wives met the strip-club owner who paid a hundred grand for his ticket, that's their business. ...read
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The BBC thinks climate change is the biggest threat to mankind. Not a week passes without scary new 'revelations' about the harm being done by carbon emissions, and the inevitable admonitions that we should turn off our lights. Alas, the BBC evinces very few signs of reforming itself ...read
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When Demi Moore shaved off her hair in the film GI Jane, it was the act of a woman asserting that she could be as tough as any guy. When Britney Spears gave herself a buzz cut, it looked more like desperate self-mutilation ...read
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From the Mandelson scandal to MPs'expenses, Norman Baker's ferreted out more shady secrets our rulers than anyone. ...read
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Non-domestic Goddess Publishing Ltd would like, this week, to build on the astonishing success of their Teenopedia which, judging by the letters and e-mails received since last week, offended only 29 per cent of you ...read
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American economists have spent the past few months agonising loudly about the 'anxious middle classes' who are being squeezed by the global economy ...read
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The streets went from cold and empty to full. And it took one minute. Now the silent park was a place filled with noise. Here come the kids out of Bacon's College, Rotherhithe, South-East London. Jade walked home this way. Bacon's was her school. She learned a lot in there ...read
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