'Don't Hug Me' tells the story of a small-town bar April 27, 2007 | If you go What: "Don't Hug Me" by Phil Olson. When: 7:30 p.m. May 4-5, 11-12, 18-19 and 2:00 p.m. May 12. Where: Beaumont Community Players, 5515 Phelps Road. Tickets: $10, $18 and $20. Online tickets can be purchased at www.beaumontcommunityplayers.com Contact: (409) 842-4664. | By Mary Vandeventer
Special to The Enterprise Now sweeping the nation, the hit song "I'm a Walleye Woman in a Crappie (pronounced "croppy") Town" is sure to thrill audiences everywhere. Wait - you haven't heard it? Then you'll want to be sure to mark your calendars for the Beaumont premiere of the song, featured in the Beaumont Community Players' next show, "Don't Hug Me," opening May 4. "Don't Hug Me," named best new musical in 2003 in Los Angeles, tells the story of the denizens of a small bar in Bunyan Bay, Minn., close to the Canadian border. Gunner Johnson, who owns the aptly named bar "The Bunyan," wants to sell his place and move to warmer climes, perhaps because it's 78-below. His wife, Clara, wants to stay, for reasons Southeast Texans would probably find difficult to fathom. After all, Florida vs. 78-below? It's a no-brainer. Gunner Johnson ("typecast" according to director Jerry McMillan, because he's Swedish) is played by BCP favorite Allan Anderud. "He's just copying the way his mother and dad used to talk," McMillan said with a laugh. Debbie Elliott plays Gunner's wife Clara. Coming into the bar to stir things up is Aarvid Gisselsen (Brent Bost), selling, of all things, the LSS 562, the "Lifestyle Systems." Aarvid is one slick talker. "He convinces the bar owners that business is not bad because it's 78-below and the coldest day in history," McMillan said, "but because there's no entertainment in the bar." And what kind of entertainment is Aarvid selling? Karaoke. And his machine, he's certain, is the perfect fit for the Bunyan. Given BCP's current focus on its new theater, set for a partial opening in September, "Don't Hug Me" is also a perfect fit for their current production needs. "It's so difficult to do musicals when you're tying up musicians for three or four weeks," McMillan said. "But this is karaoke, and so it's very easy to get done. It doesn't matter a whole lot how good you do the songs because it's karaoke, and so it's supposed to be tongue in cheek." "Don't Hug Me's" cast is rounded out by Gladys Thomas and Don Belt, who play Bernice and Chanute. Bernice wants a singing career; Chanute, her fiancé, wants her to choose the career of the stay-at-home woman. "This is a cartoon-style play," McMillan said. "These people are just bigger than life, in many ways, but they just take life day to day." mcvandeventer@juno.com | 
